Monthly Archives: July 2016

the unofficially official axes of Camp Ton

the unofficially official axes of Camp Ton are……………



Yes I have a chainsaw, and yes I know how to use one but there is something primal and satisfying about using an axe. visceral and joyful.

I am fair certain I have talked about axes before, but recently I had the chance to drop three trees on my property. Good size trees, about as wide around as I am. I won’t get into the how. There are a shit ton of videos on the youtube on how to do it, some of them done by guys who know how to do it better then me. If I was in a rush I would have used a chainsaw or pulled them out of the ground with my F250, but I like to do man shit, the boss life wasn’t taking up to much of my time that day( my payroll firm messed up and I had to wait around for FedEx to drop off my guy’s payroll checks) and using an axe is near on the pinnacle of man shit

I should have timed it but it couldn’t have been more then 45 mins to drop the 3 trees. Could have been done sooner I reckon but I am old, not at my peak psychical condition and took a lot of water breaks. It’s a less then pleasant summer with temps that closed in on 100 with nasty high humidity. Thankfully I was out of direct sunlight and the lake does help to keep things cool… and it was damn near orgasmic to jump in the lake after the axe work was done

My Gransfors are relatively new. Don’t recall when I bought them, or who recommended them but I haven’t used mine much. Really I don’t do much stuff like this anymore. Partly dude to age and what not but mostly because I don’t have the time. Think being a Platoon Daddy to 30-35 young men consumes your time? Trying running a couple of bidness.

Any rate, a neighbor wandered over while I was sectioning the trees( cutting one into rounds to use as seating once I get my big ass fire-pit is dug in) to offer the use of one of his stump grinders. He noticed the axe and brought me his later on that evening. His is a token from his youth, which is decades ago. The thing as seen some use, I know he use to cut fire wood and what not to help pay for college. The damn thing is still in good shape and ready for work. Original handle as far as I can tell. Pretty sure he used a file to keep it sharp too. Nothing fancy for that good ol boy

Mostly what impressed me is how well the axes bit. Yeah I am pretty strong, and remembered how to use the damn thing with a quickness but even my shitty strokes bit hard. I was taking 4-6 inch chunks of wood every 3-4 strokes once I got my grove back

I have their Scandinavian Forest axe and their splitting maul. Which is also a beast. Their hunting axe is on the way.

Anyrate it was a good time, which it almost always is when you are working with good tools. The trees came down, I limbed them with the chain saw, then cut one into sections with the chain saw. That was tricky. Not so much using a  chain saw but figuring our what was a good sitting height and making good smooth cuts. I have the other two trees resting on good size tree limbs, waiting for them to cure. One is a pine tree, which are kind of useless to me, but might make a good obstacle once it cures some. The other is some sort of hard wood. I’ll split it for the fire-pit or fireplace. I generally dislike cutting down hard wood trees, but these three bastards where killing my lake view. Now I can look out my bedroom window when I am banging out of my Girls from behind.

The Ton life yo!

It was a good day. If I was smart I would have set out my fishing yo-yo’s and had a fish fry afterward too. But alas I am not that smart these days. To focused on other shit. Maybe this weekend

Also, I have a total man crush on the old guy living next door. He is a tough old bastard, fought in Korea, brought himself up from nothing, has worked on all kinds of shit, including oil rigs and now has a construction company. Build large scale farm stuff and is banging some 51 year old bitch that he knows is mostly a gold digger. Solid Game and Frame from a 74 year old. Hell he might be older.