Alpha in music from the gash’s point of view

 

Hate Myself For Loving You”

Midnight, gettin’ uptight, where are you?
You said you’d meet me, now it’s quarter to two
I know I’m hangin’ but I’m still wantin’ you
Hey Jack, it’s a fact they’re talkin’ in town
I turn my back and you’re messin’ around
I’m not really jealous, don’t like lookin’ like a clown
I think of you ev’ry night and day
You took my heart then you took my pride away

I hate myself for loving you
Can’t break free from the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you
That’s why I hate myself for loving you
Ow! Uh

Daylight, spent the night without you
But I’ve been dreamin’ ’bout the lovin’ you do
I’m over being angry ’bout the hell you put me through
Hey, man, bet you can treat me right
You just don’t know what you was missin’ last night
I wanna see you begging, say forget it just for spite
I think of you ev’ry night and day
You took my heart and you took my pride away

I hate myself for loving you
Can’t break free from the the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you
That’s why I hate myself for loving you
Ow! Huh

I think of you ev’ry night and day
You took my heart and you took my pride away

I hate myself for loving you
Can’t break free from the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you
That’s why I hate myself for loving you

I hate myself for loving you
Can’t break free from the the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you
That’s why I hate myself for loving you

I hate myself for loving you
I hate myself for loving you
I hate myself for loving you
I hate myself
I hate myself for loving you

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/joanjettandtheblackhearts/ihatemyselfforlovingyou240782.html

In the intrest of full disclosure, Joan Jett use to make my motor run something ferice

Keep on trucking

I don’t normally write much about long-term life with women. Mostly because my marriage was a train wreck and I have had more success pulling chicks and nexting bitches then keeping them around but things with The Girls have been going well for awhile now. Even after this last meat grinder of a year. I can’t recall the last anything resembling a shit tests and when things looked their worst this year, The Girls never wavered. They never bitched when our budget was cut by more then half, they never got pissy when I hit the road to clear my head. No second guessing. No nagging or pitty parties.

That’s a new experience for me. Times past, women added stress. From the beginning The Girls have made it a habit to talk about me in the 3rd person as if I am not there. Its always amused me. When The Girls talk about me/ us etc it’s no longer about how masculine I am, or how I am an asshole or impossible to live with or how could they both love an asshole so much etc etc

These days the Girls mostly mention how much fun they have with me. I am not sure why the evolution in their discussions but it has been an interesting change, one I didn’t notice until recently. Could a sense of shared adventure be key to LTR success? One would think I started out fun then became an impossible to live with asshole, isn’t that the script? I reckon it took them awhile to fully submit to my frame and adjust to The Ton life. Even the small stuff like eating off those tin camping plates, using dutch ovens over open fires to make supper, fire pit,  smores and wine almost nightly is a departure from their norm.

They never camped before me, didn’t know you could wrap eggs, sausage and hash browns in aluminum foil, toss it on a fire and have breakfast in a few minutes. Never caught fish let alone turn the fish into lunch, right there on the beach by wrapping the fish in foil and tossing it on the fire. Or made chicken stew in a Dutch over over a campfire.

Now all that is old news, but last weekend was our 1st trip off roading. During the build, The Girls were all sickly sweet looks and skeptical smiles but I knew they would enjoy the end results. Girl#2 has always been all about mechanical mayhem and I knew she would enjoy it. Girl#1 gets all smiley and pissed when I do burnouts on the bike or Mustang, but you can tell she loves it, embarrassed about loving it, but loves it, so I was pretty sure she would enjoy the off roading trip.

What I didn’t expect is how much they would enjoy it.

Now the truck isn’t the most radical off road ride but she’ll get the job done. And then some. I lifted it and all that kind of stuff but where I went a little off course is setting it up for camping. We have a camper shell on it, put a homemade rail system in the bed so we can store stuff and slide it all out when we need it and built a bedframe above that so we can sleep on a very comfy foam mattress. A roof rack holds the extra tires, fuel and what not, we can put two kayaks on top of the camper shell if we choose. It ain’t pretty but it’s gets the job done.

Girls eat up attention,and we got a lot of attention. The off road truck/ camper combo was a hit with the other people in the camp site, so was the dog. The Lady Pit is striking, with a big, big friendly personality. We cooked out, and in high fashion. Slept on a nice foam mattress, woke up and had those egg, sausage and hash brown bombs….. we were the talk of the camp ground and I could tell Girl#2 was eating it all up with a spoon, and Girl#1 was enjoying herself as well but in her more reserved manner.

Then we got on the trail. The 1st thing I did was some donuts in the mud, slinging that stuff everywhere while the dog tried to climb in my lap and The Girls laughed like fools. We ran two trails, and I let them run a beginner trail and they were all “we love you” and big smiles. And proud of themselves for driving their 1st off road course.

A week later and it’s about all they talk about.

From a Game perspective there is a lot going on; displays of mastery, demonstrating higher value, pre selection as the other girls at the camp flocked around the rig, talked up my cooking etc etc but but don’t ignore Cindy Lauper’s advice either

I have been deliberate in choosing the outdoor life. These things are fun but there is a larger purpose behind most of what I do. There are certain things I want my son’s to learn. About themselves and about the world, some of which can only be learned outdoors. Some things can only be learned in the ring, others in team sports but the boys are to young for the ring or the ball field.  There are family tradtions I want to preserve for another generation. Skill sets I dont want to see pass away. There are things I want them to do. I want my family to eat certian things and in certian ways. I want these things because they will make my boys better men. I was deliberate in choosing off-roading vs dirt bikes too. I prefer two wheels to 4 but it will be years before the boys can sit a bike but at this point it should all be fun

Have a mission, bend them to your will, have fun

Freedom, Firepower and FuckYeah “(c) 2016 Ton’s Place” ….. The Ton life bitches

The Ton Life is a life long quest for Freedom, Firepower and FuckYeah! (FFPFY) “(c) 2016 Ton’s Place”. … ie Bikes, Booze, Brawls and Bitches. In that order but men age and things change….

What is Freedom, FirePower and FuckYeah! ? FFPFY is the masculine life taken to its limits, the rush men feel when living an unrepentant, unapologetic life of unreconstructed masculine Frame. It’s that combination high of testosterone and adrenaline as you knee drag your 1st corner, pull your 1st big deadlift, land that trophy bass…. it is fleeting and addicting, pushing you toward knee dragging the next corner.’  FFPFY is being fully alive vs the mass of living dead seen shuffling around you. It’s also the only addiction worth having and I reckon all other addictions are a proxy high for the adrenaline/ testosterone combo. Addictions to pussy, booze, pills or cards leave men broken, hollow and shambling around in the same living dead condition as the zombies on Walking Dead or that sparky who lives three doors down.  Addiction to  testosterone and adrenaline may very well lead to a broken body and a short life, but it gives your kids great ways to brag about their Old Man and you damn sure won’t be hollow inside.

Freedom the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action

the quality or state of being exempt or released usually from something onerous               <freedom from care>

the quality of being frank, open, or outspoken

boldness of conception or execution

unrestricted use

Now that’s some scary shit if you are a bitch ( either the kind with a gash or dude without balls). Men doing what they want? Cannot have that. They might drink a little to much, spend some time mudding around their favorite fishing hole, refuse to wear a seat belt or helmet… hell they might even smoke in public and not work those extra 400 hours a year to support some ungrateful bitch I mean loving wife. He might just smoke a little weed, lose some money at cards, not be heard from for three days because his dog is better company then his old lady and kids or because the deer stand more fulfilling then some bullshit job. His employer might have to make a little less money off him, Madison Avenue might not be able to con him into buying shit he doesn’t need, church pews might be a little less full and the man hating preacher out of simps to AMOG, the government might have to do with a little less tax revenue and banks might have to make a little less off their usury…. and bold open non politically correct language might hurt someones wittle feelings…. O the humanity

Sounds an awful like they hate your Freedom because you might choose not to live a life of soft slavery.

FirePower is the military capability to direct force at an enemy…… Firepower involves the whole range of potential weapons. The concept is generally taught as one of the three key principles of modern warfare wherein the enemy forces are destroyed or have their will to fight negated by sufficient and preferably overwhelming use of force as a result of combat operations.

Through the ages firepower has come to mean offensive power applied from a distance……is thus something employed to keep enemy forces at a range where they can be defeated in detail or sapped of the will to continue.

Best definition I’ve read in a while right there but for our purposes a Man’s FirePower isn’t only about the gun in his pocket(though you better have one). It’s about his Frame, the strength of his mind and his iron will.( read G Gordon Liddy’s book Will) A man who values his Freedom doesn’t want to live that life of soft slavery. A man with FirePower will resits that soft slavery. He’ll ignore the shaming language and the man up rants. He won’t be cowed by his boss, he won’t give a fuck what the so called elites have to say, He won’t tip his hat and say yes sir to some petty tyrant with a badge

FuckYeah! isn’t simply an expression of defiance, or a quite resignation toward a job that needs doing. It’s a a statement of excitement. It’s not simply a willingness to engage in risky behavior, or to rebel for the sake of smashing shit. It is a statement full of joy and lust for the challenges ahead. It is not “let’s do this”; it is “let’s roll ’cause this shit makes my cock hard”

It’s difficult to control men who are hooked on testosterone fueled Freedom, FirePower and FuckYeah……resistant to manipulation, difficult to control, difficult to predict, primal and bordering on the feral….. which is why nice guys, the nanny state and women fear it.. Want to know why they beat the masculinity out of little boys? It’s because they fear he’ll grow into a man, unbowed, unyielding, wild, free and dangerous.  Weak men and women are driven by fear and their need to control life around them to offset their fear.

Don’t let the bitches win; don’t let them turn you or your son or the dudes in your crew into bitches.

This post fueled by moonshine, homemade muscadine wine and the two sexy ass bitches singing in my shower

LOM(Lack of motivation ) and men going there own way; the observations of an aging grunt.

In various Army schools ( the tougher ones) there is this concept called LOM, short for Lack of Motivation. If you are dropped from one of these schools for LOM your invitation to the ball is permanently rescinded. You can fail and fail and fail but if you don’t drive yourself as hard as you can you are gone for good. Some schools will fail your ass just to see if you’ll come back but the unforgivable sin is not trying hard enough.

 

I see girls in the SMP working the same concept. Mild shit tests are a way of her checking your motivation. How badly do you want her? The fucked up thing is, want her badly enough to put up with her bullshit and she doesn’t want you. Next her to soon and no ass for you. A large number of men are playing the game in this grey area, looking for the sweet spot of when they should next the bitch or push forward all while trying to deal with her pysops and deception campaign against him

 

The Army is divided up in several large sections. One of the more basic divisions is conventional warfare vs the unconventional warfare units. There are the war fighters, the combat arms guys like infantrymen, artillery, tankers etc and support personal. The unconventional guys are, in general terms, more fit, more motivated etc then the conventional guys. The unconventional guys are broken down into a tier system. Tier 3 outfits, tier 2 outfits and tier one outfits. There are more men starting in the NFL then hold a tier 1 slot. People will often assume something foolish like why doesn’t the Army make everyone a tier one door kicker, but the world doesn’t work like that. There are only X number of men who can make that cut, who can drive themselves that hard, nor does everyone need to be tier one to win wars and a man is not somehow lesser because he is tier 2 or a conventional war fighter but girls with their run away hypergamy and out of control sense of self don’t get that. They only want tier one men. And he has to be tier one in every aspects ( or lest think he is. Women do a shitty job determining reality vs illusions)They can be happy with a tier 2 guy if she hits a certain level of age and introspection and will settle for a tier three man but her happiness and his will be short lived,

 

In comes men going their own way. The interwebz and maybe the world has this concept that men who go their own way are somehow lacking in ambition or drive and frankly their is good reason to suspect that because often the loudest voices for going their own way are men who have been kicked more often then a stray dog in the hood, however my observations do not fully support the MGTOW are looser mantra and all SMP’s are local.

 

Most of the men in my platoons were going their own way. They did the math and women didn’t make the cut. These are not men who suffered from a lack of motivation. Before coming to me the volunteered to join the Army. To be Paratroopers and infantrymen in the war time Army. Infantry school isn’t as tough as Ranger school, but its not something most military men want to deal with. Same with jump school and frankly infantry school and jump school are the easy parts. The hard part comes when your assigned to a unit. To be in my platoon they had to have done a combat tour, score 80% or better in every aspect of the Army’s physical fitness test, be tactically and technically sound and do our 3 week tryout/ training program. NCO’s had to have Ranger tabs or agree to go to Ranger school when the slots showed up. Then they had to desire being in my platoon with my training schedule and most of them did all this because they wanted to be a cut above the average Paratrooper and they wanted to brawl more down range.

 

What does that mean in SMP/MMP terms? Well, frankly not much because women want finished products and these are young men, still in the making. They aren’t the best providers going but its a decent paycheck, always on time and always with medical coverage. They were fit and while not necessarily educated and book smart, they were smart enough to learn all the shit they need to know and they are not the kind of men to back down from tough situations and this brought them… pretty much nothing in our local SMP. So they generally dropped out of it. Guns, cars, trucks, beer and yes Call of Duty with their crew was more enjoyable then chasing girls. These are young, fit, testosterone driven young men who with no fanfare, made the decision girls in the local market were not worth the effort.

 

On a personal note, I have always enjoyed my time away from the SMP. Its when I learned the most, did the most, trained the hardest etc etc. I was successful despite being married not because of it. During my last break in the SMP I bought a decent camera, something in the $300 range, took a class on photography and rode the Blue Ride Parkway, start to finish and back taking pictures the whole way. Took me 12 days to do less then a thousand miles. One of the best things I have ever done but I have also built bikes, gone to driving school, improved all manner of skills like carpentry, small engine repair, wielding and squatted 725 in contest. In short I am who I am because I exist the SMP regularly

Folks should think on that before they get to running down MGTOW.

 

 

 

Ton’s big news

Well The Shadow Knight nailed it. Girl#1 is pregnant. I…. don’t really know how or what I think/ feel about this.

I want more children but this is a huge risk to her and the child’s health. She was told a long time ago that she was unlikely to bare children, and that any pregnancy would pose a serious risk to her and the child’s health. Because of this, she has been on the pill and I wear raincoats. Murphy’s law in action; anything that can happen will happen; anything that can fail will fail. I also wonder how this will affect the dynamics of things between us and the other two girls. Only time will tell

Mostly I am worried for her and the child. On the upside, the 1st 3 months were the highest risk for the child, which is why she waited to tell me. I get that, I have been hesitant on telling other folks. Like I don’t want to have to tell people if she loses the child. On the down side, the last 3 months are the highest risk for her. We talked about this before and neither of us are fans of murdering the unborn, so we’ll roll the dice and see how this comes up. It eats at me that this is not my battle to fight. I want her to stop working, she doesn’t want to listen to the doctors. Just dumb. We don’t need the money. I will go back to my state side job next month. No down range time until after the baby is born. Maybe not even then. I got my own share of not good medical news and well kids change things. I will pay off the house with in the month. This does mean staying here vs moving to Duplin.This also messes with will, but I’ll get that worked out next month.

Not all my homecomings over the years have been happy. This was a happy one. My daughter and Girl#1 meet me at the airport. We had a late night meal, dropped my daughter off at her place and went home. Girl#1 makes my motor run. I didn’t go without sex while down range, but once I pulled Girl#1 into me it sure felt like I had. The Hell Hounds had other plans so I had to play with the dogs before I could reacquaint myself with Girl#1.
Girl#2 cried when I showed up at her graduation party unannounced. She looks better than ever. Her and Girl#3 have both stepped up their Girl Game. I had a good time there. No one from their work showed up so we were free to be a family of 4. We had to switch waitress in the middle of the party. I told our waitress she couldn’t leave as she was the best looking gal on the staff and I didn’t want an ugly chick bringing me booze. I talked her into lining up a few other waitresses so I could pick our replacement. The wait staff laughed pretty hard but some of Girl#2’s SIW type friends were offended. Also funny, but the moral of that story is….. you can get away with damn near anything if you do it with a grin on your face and a smile in your eyes. Girl#3 helped me pick out our new waitress. She rocks

I also attended a ball with Girl#3. This was a work event for her and our 1st one on one event. She looked fabulous in her red cocktail dress with her new found skillz in makeup and hair fixing. Girl#3 use to be a strap hanger, along for the ride because of Girl#2, but that is no longer the case. I got all slicked up and charmed the panties off the women at the ball. Think I upset most of the dudes there, which I pretty much counted on. She is in most beta of branches and I seem to upset betas just by breathing

Otherwise it has been daily life. I shot two dove, lost my ATM card, replaced the battery in a bike and the Cobra, the Cobra’s convertible top won’t move…. Caught 0 fish, saw 0 deer and the one bear I saw was why out of range. Damn bow hunting. Probably the biggest bear I have seen in Eastern NC, but I am not as experienced bear hunter as I would like to be. Figure some deer are probably partying hard on my ATM card.This was our 1st time hunting out of this deer camp. I have a lot of improvements to make #1 being the shed we were living in was way drafty.  I spent two days on my bike. Folks say its too cold, I tell them their genital is too small. Now its time to work on the Christmas decorations

still thinking women should vote?

 

CORCORAN, Calif. –  Mass murderer Charles Manson has gotten a license to marry a 26-year-old woman who visits him in prison.

The Kings County marriage license, viewed Monday by The Associated Press, was issued Nov. 7 for the 80-year-old Manson and Afton Elaine Burton, who left her Midwestern home nine years ago and moved to Corcoran, California — the site of the prison — to be near Manson. She maintains several websites advocating Manson’s innocence.

 

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/11/18/charles-manson-gets-wedding-license/

My beloveds

There are 5 women in my regular life, all are dear to me. I never tell them 4 of them anything silly like “I love you” I simply don’t believe in the word as it is commonly used. They are my beloveds, most dear, cherished ones…..of course I call the youngest two my monkeys as well. Each is dear to me in her own way, but I’ll leave my Black Beauty out of this discussion.

My majordomo (MD) is a 74 year old Italian lady. Her husband, who was 10 years older than her, left the hills to joined the Air Force as a fire fighter and see the world. They meet in Italy in during his 1st enlistment and after 30 years he retired, moved back to the hills and they opened a restaurant. Along the way they had 4 kids, 3 boys, 1 girl and semi adopted me. I cannot remember awhen they were not in my life, and because of MD, I learned a lot about family and customs. Some I still do today. Like on Easter, the 1st male child to visit got a silver coin. I still do this. They were kind to me when I was a child in a way my parents couldn’t afford to be( my mother was an abusive bitch but to be fair I was out of control as a kid and there weren’t many opportunities for my old man to go easy on me). What I know about cooking, how I view food as family and pleasure and acts of love comes from her. Really my whole concept of a high functioning domestic life comes from MD and her late husband. When they became old and infirm, I would travel up there and help with the up keep their home. One weekend me and my little brother cut a trail from their house to their pond so MD’s husband could keep fishing via a golf cart. He also taught me most of what I know about being a carpenter. We’re I’m deficient is a statement on my own limitations and not his. I’ve been gone for a minute but I can close my eyes and see MD in my mind’s eye, but cannot say the same for my mother. I love her like she is blood. At t my brother’s funeral I dropped my sister in laws step dad l because her mom asked “who the hell is she?” in the wrong tone for the second time. 1st time I told him to fix his bitch. He didn’t so I addressed his failure. She runs my house and life. Not the big stuff, but the important day to day functions are hers and she does it perfectly. I have no idea why she decided to live with me vs her own kids but I am eternally grateful she has. Before I settled in with the Girls, a few of the girls I was dating displayed various unpleasant attitudes toward her. I ejected them with a quickness. She has improved the quality of my life in every facet. And she gets a kick out of how I deal with women. When we were discussing her moving in I told her some things about how my life and women intersect. She had to believe it to see it. MD is the only woman I am not related to and still hears I love you from me.

Girl #1(G1) is my biker Barbie doll. She is 16 years younger than me and finished up her stuff to be a Nurse Practioner last spring. I bought her a bike to celebrate…. Actually I bought it in advance and told her it was for when she finished. It’s a 2002 bagger with crash bars, wind screen bags and some engine work so she can keep up. Right now she is pulling down extra shifts to pay off the last of her debt. She is the most self aware, even tempered woman I have had the pleasure of sleeping with. She is blonde, petite, with a tight ass, C cups, tatted and priced so she isn’t for everyone but most men would rate her an 8. She has this butterfly motif going on. She does end of life care and somehow butterflies escort souls to the next life. The work is excellent, matching her body and discreetly placed. She is loving and submissive, a joy to behold and a joy to hold but she came up hard in this world. I feel at peace when I see her. At one point she told me I am scarier than anything that scares her which was put to the test when the urban youth tried to culturally enrich us. It took her sometime to get over it. Her father beat her brother to death in front of her when she was 5. The State killed her father; her mother shacked up with a string of loser biker guys, some of who beat my beloved resulting in fertility and lady part problems. She also digs chicks. She went off the rails at one point in her life, not as far as some but enough that she no longer drinks and what not. I helped her get the last few pieces of her life in order and at one point told her getting her NP was a requirement for living under my roof fulltime. Why? Because I know it was something she wanted, some strange landmark that in her mind would erase the stupidly of her youth. We started off rocky, but after a few months everything settled into a very peaceful rhythm.

I was introduced to Girl#1 through mutual acquaintances. Email mostly. She is a deliberate girl, and it was very much like interviewing for a job. I smoked the interview. She had tried this in the past and it failed. My answers were pretty much the opposite of what she experienced, I addressed potential problems she hadn’t thought about and my answers were short and concise. I also had references i.e. social proof. This is on top of the underlying, autopilot sort of things like her growing up around various motorcycle crews. I went to a rather large social gathering to meet her. It was a few hours away on the coast. Now I don’t mind traveling for pussy, but I schedule more than one liaison for the weekend. In this case I had two other girls lined up, and plans to meet a few other poly families, plus you know…. bike ride to the beach, weekend at the beach etc. No single point of failure. We meet at the party; she blew me off to catch up with friends. I hit up the families I am familiar with, charmed a few girls and left with some other blonde( who was introduced to me by another Poly family head of house hold). Saturday afternoon I show back up with the new blonde in tow and put on a demonstration. This is when she remembered we had a date and she blew me off. We worked out a meet time on Monday and things went from there. The take away on this? Lots of demonstrating high value won the day.

I made Girl#1 my girl when she aggressively defended me against some slander. I didn’t ask for her hand etc. I took it. She didn’t complain.

Girl#2(G2)….. she is my beloved monkey. Funny and fierce. I see her and smile; we spend a lot of time laughing like loons for no particular reason. It’s been 12 months of it so far. I am 19 years older than her; she is a few months younger then my daughter. I’d rate her a 7, nice petite body, long, long brown hair, big brown eyes…. Cute really is the word. Her and her girl power…. I love making fun of her girl power. I was teaching some other military branch how to run an M4, pistol and tactical shotgun, a train the trainer thing and she was doing a story on the training. Afterward there was a party were we got to talking and… well we got to talking. We texted and what not for about 3 months before we both had the same weekend off. I had to lure her out of her shell. She was timid and frightened and I ran the long game with her. Course I had other women in play so it was a non event for me. When I 1st rode out to meet her, she had this thing about how we weren’t going to have sex etc. LOL. She meet me at the door, I put my hand around her throat, kissed her, told her she belonged to me and dragged her to bed. I have helped her out a lot. If you want to keep young girls around and especially more then one, you have to add value to their life or social  pressure will get to them. I fixed her wardrobe; put her on a budget, a diet and an exercise program. And she fixed her attitude at work. He parents hate me. When I meet them for the 1st time, her mother went nuts about the age difference, which I get but there are ways to comport one’s self. I looked at her father, told him to fix his bitch and went back to my bike to get my stuff. He followed me so I put on my game face and he shut up. Her mom got so pissed she just left for the weekend. Her family spent the weekend worrying about the over reaction of a woman… Is there anything more beta? She came back and he was joyful. Didn’t spank her or tell her to stay gone or anything. He rewarded her poor behavior…. I had a long talked with Girl#2 about how none of her mother’s bullshit will be tolerated. Alpha vs beta….. guess who wins? They are still pretty hostile about it all, but keep their mouths shut. City people are fucked up. Their son sucks dick which is ok, but there girl dating an older man is the end of the world…..She is done with her master’s degree next month. She had this weird deal where she got scholarships and student loans. She was 27k in debt with 24k in savings. WTF? It’s not that way now. On her own, she is a pain in the ass strong independent type no one wants to be around. Under me she is funny, charming and life of the party.

Girl#1 and I have the exact same notion of how a poly home should be run, and she wanted to be the woman who worked outside of the home. Girl#2 from the start wanted to be the stay at home partner and to have kids. Girl#2’s willingness to live in a poly house is twofold. Number one, she craves a lot of familial love and affection. Number two her devotion to me. I also think it was an attempt to lessen the pain of losing her girlfriend. When I meet her, her long term girlfriend was already on orders to change duty stations. My fierce, funny little monkey does not do well with change or loss. Girl#1 is not my dirty little secret, she is a corner stone of my poly life, so there was some major pre selection working in my favor. Girl#2 is of Italian stock, form a big city in Florida. She took to my majordomo like a duck to water. She has a long way to go on the domestic front but she is working on it. What set her above so many is her attitude, desire to make me smile and laugh. I cannot recall exactly how she said it, but I have the resting pissed off face and understandably this translates to her as me being unhappy and she was very clear in wanting to make me smile and laugh like I make her smile and laugh. Girl#3 is along for the ride, though becoming more a part of us all the time.

Her and Girl#3(G3) were a couple in high school and a match set, including never cleaning up after work before hitting the local bar for football night; drinking too much for their budget and an obsession with football. Like Monday night ball, Thursday night ball and of course damn near all day Sunday. They are both young enough where that kind of living hadn’t caught up with them and I fixed that shit before it could. Everything in their wardrobe is Ton approved, and they are no longer allowed out in public in their work coveralls. One of the 1st time I went to their local bar, a giant fat chick gave me a huge fat chick hug and thanked me for fixing her baby doll’s clothing. She’s the owner’s wife. Pretty funny in person. Small town coastal NC is a fun place to live and explore. The odds are good but the goods are odd.

Girl#3 is also petite with dark hair, but a little thicker in all the places that count then the other two girls. Daddy likes. She is also a city girl so I had some manner issues to address. We were pretty tense for awhile, mostly she was trying to make things work because of Girl#2 same as me. She was worried about losing her beloved which I also understand. Took us some time to work through it; all on her part but we did. What really solidified things between me and her was when her and Girl#2 where having issues. Girl#3 had orders for California. It happens and its part of our life, a reality to be dealt with. Well Girl#2 does not do change well, instead of enjoying what was supposed to be our last months together, Girl#2 began driving Girl#3 away. This was devastating to Girl#3. I pulled them both together and told them point blank this was not acceptable and if Girl#2 wanted to stay in my life Girl#3 was a permanent fixture. I said this for Girl#3 and…. Well it changed her attitude toward me like nothing else. She likes to shit test and she likes to be put in her place when she throws a shit test my way and she has this shit eating grin when she does it. For whatever reason, she simply cannot ask for xyz, you have to understand her and lay it down. Girl#1 will just come to me and say “Daddy I…..”. The other two not so much, Girl#3…. it’s like it’s an impossibility for her. Neither me or Girl#1 planned on having this large of a home, but you take what comes your way in this life. Her parents actually approve of the changes in her life since coming to me. She is not a smart girl and this causes some contention. Both her and Girl#2 want their opinions to carry weight like MD and G1. Not going to happen. A master’s degree means nothing to me, both are too young to have much life experience… I bought G3 her 1st legal beer. I am 22-23 year older then her. Both are city girls and by default I am leery of city “wisdom”. Any rate, I handle this by letting them talk some

One big misconception is how dread etc works out. They don’t go around walking on egg shells fearing they will drive me toward one of the other girls. There are no dark clouds etc. There is nothing dark and brooding about my soul or my home. Dread is in play, and it is overt same with demonstrating higher value, frame control and everything else. I’m not a subtle man. Dread example#1; Girl#1 is in pure crave mode on the Thursday nights before one or both of the monkeys come over. Nor is our home some kind of porn shoot. I have a high sex drive and three girls who turn me on but we are pretty much like any other family with all the good and bad. I have this theory women know when other women are pulling a shit test but are not self aware enough to realize when they are. With three women, each one gets to watch me maintain frame, DHV etc from a detached perspective. I think this helps keep my position and masculine strength for most in their subconscious thought.  A lot of poly homes crash and burn, I see it regularly but so do most one man/ one woman homes and they crash and burn for the same reasons; blue pill philosophy, lack of masculine frame/ headship and rebellious women. I have no blue pill in me, only time my masculine frame slipped is when I was dumb enough to listen to the advice of women and modern Christians and I don’t tolerate major rebellion from my girls.