Occasionally I will do certian formal events Gril#1 attends as part of her semi doctoring job. Plus its always fun when people realize I own a tuxedo. A basic Kelvin Kline tux, which oddly enough all of their shit has proven to be easier to customize for my build and sidearm of choice then any other brand I have tried. Wouldn’t that be a hell of an advertising campaign for them? Buy our shit because it fits burly rednecks and XDM’s better then the other rags….. any rate its always a weird crowd to me. I have talked at length about some of the things that strike me as off. Like them not being all that wealthy, not nearly as wealthy as they would have folks believe or as well educated as they believe themselves to be and how unaware of the world around them they are. They live in this bubble that makes them damn near insufferable. With a little practice, you can sit in my bar and pick out the UMC folks vs the truly wealthy folks by how they interact with the world around them, with the UMC types being much more uncomfortable when their bubble is bumped around some.
Wasn’t all that different as any other event. As far as black tie shit goes. We got there early so we could change in our hotel room and I could make her walk around the party with a box full of Ton batter. The car in front of us at the valet station was a 328 BMW with a “gotphd” vainty plate….. right there is about all you need to know about this ass clown. Not sure a 33k-51k automobile is a ringing endorsement for the college debt of a phd……
That bit of the shit show just got better and better though. The couple in the car was what any redneck would expect. An overly effeminate guy with long hair and an ear stud, an overly masculine woman with short hair and a scowl. You can tell they do cross fit because he looks like a fag and she is built like a dyke. Girl#1 works with the “lady”, some kimd of hospital admin bitch, but a fairly high ranking one, the dude has a phd in something usless and gets paid by the state to teach other fags the same usless shit, but they know us, so they wait while their car drives off and we go through the valet process, and I do mean wait. We have to get our stuff out of the car, which takes time but what takes the most time is talking to the young guys working there. They were drooling over my ride, absolutely dumb struck in love with her, asking questions and telling me how they don’t want to park her in case they mess something up. This absolutely bugs the shit out of Mr phd ponytail but man was it fun talking to those young men. Yes the car brings me joy but I also love how she lights up the eyes and souls of other car guys. The compromise on moving my car was they would pull her up 10-15 feet and leaving her covered and under their watchful eye all night. One thing women and girly men don’t get is how respects builds respect and lifts other men. Those boys weren’t sullen that some old dude had a nice ride and a younger woman, they were stoked with the possibilities of their future and treated my beloved Cobra and my blonde bitch with the utmost respect. I tipped well and offered them my gratitude and assurances if they did the smart thing vs the conventional thing they’d end up where I am.
So Mr phd ponytail is pissed, extra pissed because I wouldn’t shake his hand, the short hair bitch is clearly unhappy with the patriarchy oppressing her with boys engaging in silly boy talk and I reckon they are probaly pissed we were staying the night too. They seem like that type and to be h the only overtly rude UMC types we dealt with all night. The story about my car made the rounds while we were mingling and expect for the older folks, you could tell the appreciation for American muscle cars wasn’t there. I did make 3 trips put to the valet station to show off my beloved to some older folks. And I so mean folks. A couple of the older gals followed their husbands out to see what the fuss was about. They were good women. At least that night. How could I tell they were good women? Their eyes light up when their husbands else light up over the car. This is an IOI they can’t fake
800 words to set the tone for the rest of the story. Mostly you stand around, eat finger food, drink a little to much, listens to people talk about the important shit they do for the “community” and bullshit. When they talk about food, they talk about weird shit and not about how two local restaurants made the list for best in the state. Pull pork and fried seafood is to American for their tastes. When they talk about wine they won’t mention how a wine competition took a away a local winery’s silver star medal because it cost less then the minimum bottle they would rate. When they talk about cars it is never about lead sleds and horsepower. They talk about spending serious money to go overseas but haven’t seen shit here locally, or locally in the national sense.
I have been all over the world and the usa has just about everything you could want to do in the world. Unless you want to see castles and ancient ruins that is. World class sking? Folks tell me we got it. World class diving? Got it. Sleepy country roads, high altitude dessert, endless grass lands, remote islands, huge ass cities, local festivals you name it. It’s this travel thing that really struck me this time. I have been to Rome. It’s a giant tourist scam and it sucks. If you have been to Germany, England and anyone one of the Nordic countries you know what every place in Western Europe looks like…. no disrespect intened. I have enjoyed all most all my time in Eurpoe….. So on and so on. These aren’t bad people per say, but they live in a bubble. Their own different type of blue pill bubble. They know Rome is a giant tourist trap but didn’t see the reality until I mentioned it out loud. They know the grand canyon and Yellowstone are unequaled natural marvels but at the same time they don’t know they are. They have never seen the mighty Mississippi, they have never seen the serene beauty of the Blue Ridge Parkway. They have become dull to the natural wonder of our barrier islands and inter coastal waters. These things that don’t take a 10 hour plane ride and a passport aren’t on their radar screen. They cant see wealth as anything beyond a Eurpean car, the right house and formal schoolimg. Well the middle age ones. The older folks get it. One of the he older doctors said “fuck medical school should have opened a bar” when he saw my beloved, referring to the money required to build a car like that. Another older couple laughed when I dogged out Rome and most of the older folks there had done one or two European vacations and a lot more domestic ones.
Like I said they live in this bubble that makes them damn near insufferable. Can’t even have a rational conservation about Pit Bulls with them because in their bubble all bulldogs are evil or all are wonderful but victims of bad owners. I can’t imagine being happy in such a life. Can they appreciate what they have when they are willfully blind to those who are struggling? Can they fill good about the good they do when they refuse to the misery in the world ? Can they enjoy their daily life and weeknds when only Europe etc is worth visiting? Can the appreciate and rejoice in the wealth and successes of others when they can’t see the difference between themselves and folks who really have money?
Maybe I would potty them if I were a better man but I ain’t so mostly they will annoy me
*** I always imagine some Ferris Buller day off deal when I valet park that car but so far there has never been any extra miles on her. Man if I was 20…… though I reckon most young men are better men then me in that regard