Category Archives: SMP advice

Cut off and happy

I loved watching the storm last night. I opened all three French doors, pulled the recliner over, grabbed a bottle of apple wine, put my Lady Pit in my lap and settled in. The Girls slid up next to me before long.

I am, at this moment, physically cut off from the rest of the world. Its a good feeling. The road that takes us from my little sliver of the inter-coastal waterways to the main land is under water. Not sure how deep, don’t much care, but it’s a couple hundred feet wide. Don’t much care about that either. If I did, I’d put my kayak in the water and find out the depth, maybe find the road under the water, mark the path and drive my truck into town. If driving to town is posdible. Doesn’t seem to be much of a current but if there was, it woukd only take me to town. Which I am happy enough to be separated from.

It’s a peaceful easy feeling. We lost power some time back. Made our inlet nice and quiet. Of sorts. The storm was noisy, but there is no hum from the refrigerator either. I have a generator. Haven’t used it yet. I am enjoying the sounds of nature, family and my neighbors to much. Maybe I’ll crank it up when I run out of ice. Yeti coolers are money, so maybe I won’t run out of ice.

I was up early as I always am and the 1st thing I noticed (beyond the Hell jounds and the Girls) was the silence. No wind, no rain, no sound from the refrigerator. Quick check of the house while Girl glares and my Lady Pit bounces around. Neither would go out for the bathroom in the rain. Ton Spawn was sleeping in, the storm kept him up, the house was intact.

The water is high, maybe 5 ft, right at the edge of our retaining wall and over lapping my dock. We use to be surrounded by wet lands. To our front, the river/ bay, ocean and one of our larger and more popular barrier island. Which i am sure did its protecting us from the wind and storm surge. On the other three sides was wet lands and a road. Now  they are under Lord only knows how much water. I climbed up to the roof/ bbq area of my boat shed and checked out my street. We all did well. The one tree in my street, happens to be in my yard, fell. Ground was to wet to hold it, and it fell across the street. Not much of a tree or obstacle but since you can’t really drive around it now, it needed to be #1 on my to do list. Our little road was cut, and since no one was hurt, or in immediate danger, restoring our high speed avenues of approach became the priorty #1.

I love the silence. We are always quiet,  but this morning it was silent. I wanted to keep it going so I used a pocket saw instead of a chain saw. Made two cuts, which made three peices of tree and cleared the road. A short walk took me tout the next obstacle. Water. The road was cut at the community boat ramp. Not much one can do about that so I turned around and walked back.

And I do have power of sorts. Couple solar panels, couple of deep cycle marine batteries and we have been keeping our phones and tablets fully charged. Could do the same with either the truck or the SUV, but I haven’t cranked either. My neighbors have. In fact the guy at the far end of the road has a small generator going. I hear it occasionally and he came by to let us know we could stash food in his freezer, charge our phones etc. Which we took advantage of. The food storing.

He laughed when I told  him I had a generator but wasn’t using it. They all think I am crazier then a shit house rat but seem to enjoy my company any which way

I did cook for everyone earlier today. By God’s good graces we don’t have much clean up to do. Us even less because I stashed most of our stuff. Nothing major, burgers and dogs, some chicken and fish. Stuff we needed to cook before it went bad. I cooked, kept an eye on some older kids and drank slightly chilled homemade wine while they all worked.

One of the other guys tried to AMOG me.  Some lame joke about me cooking and baby sitting. I laughed, said I didn’t want to break a nail and took a long pull off my bottle of wine. Amature. There he was picking up various bits of debris,  there I was enjoying myself, grilling, drinking and watching the kids and dogs run.

It’s a pretty good life

Truly we are blessed

Life is funny. I could tell the road being cut bothered some people. A quick plan, made up on the fly settled them down. Overt displays of masculine confidence and mastery over the world around you always settles the bitches. Of both sexes. The Girls slid up next to me after the ad-hoc meeting. Daddy likes

All the shit I have on hand for emergencies and I’m not really using any of it. It’s been a very mild disaster for us. More like camping at home. I could be bossier, but why?

I had some regular non treated 2×4’s stashed in the rafters of my garage. A little work with a hand saw and now we have some fire wood. I invited the neighborhood over, all 5 families but not sure any will show up.

Almost everything amuses me. This storm hasn’t been any different on that front. Was interesting watching the Betas be stoic and sort of flippant about the storm. Good, strong  family men. Yeoman worthy of the tittle. The kids have had a blast. My Lady Pit has run wild today because there is no place for her to run off to now that we are a mini island. She has knocked all the kids down at least once. On purpose each time. Girl hasn’t left Ton Spawn or the Girls alone. She sticks to them like glue these days.  I can tell the other dudes wives are happy. Their men were right, no need to evacuate, they can now rest in the strength and decsion making skills of their man. Lest for a few days.

Everyone enjoyed that feeling you get when things are better in the morning. I could tell they all took pride and enjoyment out of cleaning up after the storm, pride and enjoyment in the various clever tricks they came up with to over come the obstacles of having no power, running water and what not. Plus the shared experience of sheltering in place

Time to go put sauce on the chicken and check my trout line before it’s fire pit, wine and pitching woo time

I know many folks are suffering right now, but the Lord was kind to me and mine last night.

Y’all take care now

 

Breaking a beta…. creating a pick up artist.

Back to my friend RJ…

RJ is not the most Beta of Beta’s but he is a little more Beta then he is Alpha, especially regarding the SMP and dealing with women. Not the biggest Blue Pill dude around but not full on Red Pill either. That came to a sudden stop last night.

Do you know what they say about jumping out of airplanes? Its not the jumping that kills you but the stopping; the Sudden Stop Syndrome and RJ’s sudden stop last night killed the Beta in him.

One of my cardinal rules for the SMP is, always have a side piece because she always has a side piece. She might be fucking him, or maybe she has Beta orbiters waiting in the wings but she has options and you are only one of them. Hell most likely not even her favorite option. Well that and it keeps your frame strong. No need to put up with much bullshit from a woman if your roster is 4 deep and three other chicks are waiting to spread their legs for you.

 

Any rate we were sitting around drinking pretty hard last night when his girl Blondie starts doing her fitness test thing, RJ do you like me, RJ do you have other women RJ I want this and that from you and I like you so much, you make me feel so safe and you are so nice to me… you’re the prefect man for me etc etc but I don’t know where we stand etc etc. We’ll she asks him “are we mutually exclusive?…. RTJ’s autonomic answer is of course we are, because RJ couldn’t fathom operating any other way. Well after RJ answered her, Blondie said she needed to cut some people lose then. Damn. All this time RJ was doing the nice guy thing and Blondie was spinning plates.

 

I could see RJ getting ready to explode, Blondie was drunk and clueless, so I grab RJ by the arm and pull him outside into the cold. Now here’s the thing, RJ could have exploded with anger etc, vented his feelings of betrayal or he could choose to pick up the knowledge bombs I have been dropping on him. RJ is smart man, and a man who doesn’t cotton to being taken advantage of, which is what happens to nice guys in the dating world. Being a nice guy in the SMP is like taking water balloons to tank battle.

 

Any rate I talk him down from detonating things with Blondie, and RJ has made the promise to always spin plates and never lead with his wallet. He plans on dropping Blondie when he has two other girls in his rotation and he plans on making it a nuclear level “next” but for the now he is going to keep her around and use sex as a weapon, pushing her limits and comfort zones, demanding she do things for him and him to her that she would normally never do… He is hell bent on using her like she used him and I doubt he will ever go back to his nice guy ways. Its cost him to much of his soul

 

Folks want to know why men do what they do in the SMP, and the answer to that question is as variable as there are number of men but surely a goodly part of that repairable answer is because of women taught them

 

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dread game an intorduction

I have this friend RJ who I’ve talked about before in  https://tonsplace.wordpress.com/2014/08/26/economics-of-motorcycles-and-alphaness/ RJ is working his way back into the SMP after a long and unsuccessful marriage. Once again he is the kind of man women say they want which puts him in the semi average frustrated chump category. He is typical for my circle of acquaintances in that he is a combat vet (airborne infantry), fit, fiscally sound etc and yet struggling to get by in a tough market because he is reluctant to go full Red Pill or travel to better hunting grounds.

 

His soft 8, Blondie, is starting to give him fits by upping the number of shit tests, mostly around how many other women he has, which is 0. Sadly. On the upside, her constant asking about other women is a pretty good sign she wants to lock him down and is worried he will pull something younger and hotter. RJ isn’t dumb enough to remarry so no worries there but he is still learning to read women, how to pass the various shit tests that come his way and I suspect leading with his wallet simply because he wants to do small, nice things for a girl who he digs while she is having money trouble. Hes a nice guy and nice guys finish last…. or don’t even make it to the starting line up. One problems is we don’t know if she wants to lock him down because she thinks he is an alpha among alphas or because she is looking for beta bucks. She is at that lane changing age, despite retaining a goodly portion of her looks. It doesn’t require much cash to fall into her beta bucks cross-hairs.  The only way to answer our question is to know how much time she spends looking for a bigger and better deal vs time spent annoying my friend about hid “other women”, which the knowing is pretty much impossible. Any which way, a woman doesn’t worry about being a side piece or him having side pieces if she doesn’t view him as somewhat alpha, good with women etc. Even if she has you in the beta bucks cross-hairs she will only worry about you having other gals if she views you as capable of pulling other chicks. If you believe most of what women say and do stems from projecting what they would like to do etc if they were men….. well it gives you a real unseemly insight to the fairer sex

Further complicating matters is women are inherently dishonest. Speaking in code means they often never speak the full truth or discover the full truth from others because they don’t ask direct questions. Often lie to themselves more then any one else… they are convoluted not complex. The whole thing is a mess and the best way to deal with their deceptive business practices is by not fully investing in a woman, which allows you to evaluate them in a more rational manner vs through a fog of sex induced haze. This is something RJ understands even if he doesn’t fully act on it

 

Anyrate a little more then a week ago, Blondie starts sending RJ texts about how she has this gut feeling RJ has other irons in the fire. I told him to deny it all which worked for about an hour. Then she asked via texts how many other women he had, and stated she was not angry etc but wanted to know…. yea that’s a set up and he fell for it texting her back with the number 0. At least it was a very short reply

Peace reigns for a few days then she asked him to come clean about women on the side and who they are. My standard answer to this is to rattle off names of famous, wealthy yet unattractive women… former 1st ladies of the united states of america makes a great answer…. yea I am banging Lura Bush, Hilary Clinton and Barber Bush when her hip is up for a good pussy pounding. Agree and amplify with a ridiculous set of options. Normally this brings me a goodly amount of peaceful days and gets them to laughing but in Blondie’s case it bought RJ a day. Less than.

The next day she texts about wanting to refrain from sex until she feels more secure….. what the fuck sense does that make? They have already been fucking for months and I tell him not to respond to that text. Instead he went for a 4 day ride with me. We rode out to Wilmington NC, down to Ft Fisher, then up to Top Sail Island before riding North Carolina’s Crystal Coast. Amazing ride. During the ride she texts him, he ignores her for the most part and pretty much tells her he’s on his bike clearing his head and thinking about their relationship….. insert dramatic music here. Think about what is going on with Blondie’s hamster. With no consultation and no warning, RJ went on a 4 day ride with a man known for keeping women in an open harem….. to think about the relationship…. women don’t like it when me think in solitude… they fear men thinking without feminine influence guiding their reckonings and to hang out with a man who can pull ass implies RJ can pull ass as well….. anyrate Blondie’s hamster was probably spinning itself to an early grave and she texts some bullshit about wanting to be just friends…. RJ tells her no, no friends stuff. Its a sexual, romantic relationship or nothing….. Blondie goes radio silent for a day then texts again…

Blondie: how many irons do you have in the fire

RJ: 150

radio silence all day Sunday

 

Monday comes around and she texts RJ: when will you be in town

RJ: late Monday

Blondie: oh. This will sound strange but I wanted to have sex today

RJ: I’ll be in town by 4; pick you up @ 9

Her: can I stay at your place until you get home

RJ: radio silence picks her up @ 930

 

Next day she texts him about how great the sex was and that she had to masturbate during work because thinking about him got her to hot to concentrate. Even sends him photos of the marks he left on her store bought D cups.

 

Dread and frame control brothers. Its like your rifle and body armor. One protects you so you can effectively use the other

on being “nonjudgmental”….tactical value of keeping your opinions to yourself

Being “nonjudgmental and keeping your opinion to yourself is an SMP tactical value all to itself. I think part of the appeal of the Bad Boy frame is women don’t feel judged(because of his lawlessness) and are therfore more honest about their questionable past.  If you are only looking for short term fun, then it doesn’t really matter but if you are looking for a long term deal, you want her to feel comfortable with you so she’ll blurt out her fuck ups…. I mean daring side.

 

Notices brothers in the SMP arms race, I didn’t say don’t judge them; I am telling you to adopt an air of being nonchalant about what she confesses to while you make your decision. Its part and parcel of purposefully and deliberate living.  Making rash, snap decisions doesn’t get you very far in life so slow down and think about what you are doing ( though there are times when you need to make a quick decision and act immediately) At some point she will drop hints about her pass; when she does this she is laying out bait to see if you bite. Bite hard and she’ll clam up and hide her bullshit better then you’ll ever imagine. Once she see’s you’re not a “judgmental asshole” she’ll open up and you’ll have better intell to make your decision on where she fits into your life. You can speed things along if you allude to your own “shady” past. Which for me is pretty easy because my present is shady enough.

 

Now some of you are saying that’s manipulative and my response is… so fucking what? The SMP/MMP is poisoned and you have to do right by yourself 1st and foremost. Remember this is combat dating and their are no rules but “win”. Sure some guys will want to jump on their moral high horse, but me, I want to win and I want to win at the lowest possible cost in time, effort and resources expended

 

For the record, I am one judgmental sonofabitch so I want the intell. Now I could snoop around, do a Google search etc but why bother when if you play it right, she’ll dump it all into your lap over a short period of time and its pretty easy to play it right. Women are dying to confess their bullshit to men who won’t judge them.

 

Though always ramped up internally, my demeanor has always been somewhat low key( that Southern country boy thing about going 100 miles per hour or not moving at all in play) plus training has lead me to hesitate just long enough to develop a better picture of the tactical situation (whenever possible; the trick is knowing when a few seconds delay will doom your ass or save you which requires experience). This outwardly nonjudgmental tactic is something I fell into naturally, saving myself all manners of future misery when I reentered the dating pool. Example #1 was this fitness competitor I dated in Hawaii. We went out a few times and before the magic date #3,she confessed via text messages, that she “revenged” cheated on her ex-husband only to find out he didn’t fuck around on her. I was not as red pill then as now, and was searching for another long term deal, so I quickly waved her off, but no doubt she felt safe owning up to it  because of my demeanor.

 

Side note, I suggest men delay anything long term/ committed etc until they have a N count of 30, give or take a few. At the 30 mark you should have seen enough bullshit from women to know what you are doing and know how to properly manage one long term. If the idea of managing a woman is barbaric/ primitive etc to you, then you are not ready to play in the SMP. You’ll get crushed unless you get extremely lucky. I dislike giving this kind of advice but its what I have seen work in the real world. A man who is reentering the SMP after marriage shouldn’t consider a long term deal until he has banged at least one girl per year married, ideally not until he can routinely set up 5 1st dates and convert at least three into a 1st night lay.

 

Any rate, not to long after that girl who preemptively revenge cheated on her faithful beta (I repeat myself) husband I ran into this stunning blonde girl and I mean stunning. Everywhere we went, men would turn their heads and women would give her the death glare kind of stunning. On top of this, she was my ideal. Sweet, kind, feminine, built for speed, utterly lacking in latent hostility toward men, her father was an Air Force veteran with SOCOM time so she had an idea about what my life was like, she wanted a large family and shared a goodly number of my political ideals. Well not to long after we start having sex ( which was once again by official date #3) she owns up to having done coke like 6 times, then she says she didn’t do blow, but has been around it because of her time working as a model. Its whatevers at this point, not something I am fond of, but not a deal breaker either. I decided to slow the emotional connecting shit down and to observe, to more fully develop the tactical situation and prep the battle field. Then she owns up to having been in a “gentlemens” magazine.  This is a deal breaker, but I liked fucking her and showing her off, I understood the power of pre selection(though I didn’t have a term for it @ that point in my life)  and I wanted to see how far down the rabbit hole things went. Now this is something I would have never thought of either. Not being a porn guy I would have never recognized her and at the time I was still apparently semi blue pill(in that hillbilly way; I was pretty sheltered really because my adult years up to that point where very secluded, tucked away in tier one and tier 3 world, working and training consuming all my time) and would never have thought about doing a back ground check. Well, nude modeling wasn’t the end of it. She did a girl on girl porn video and what made me give her the big fuck you, was her total lack of appreciation for how her actions hurt her father ( who apparently saw her in the magazine while in shopping at a BX). That was as far down the rabbit hole as I cared to go but who knows how far down the hole went?

 

So I nexted her. At one point I was way into her, and foolishly considering her as wife material, but something about my demeanor allowed her to “freely express herself”. Thankfully so or who knows what kind of misery would have been interjected into my life? and now you also have a partial understanding of why I say a man should have 30(+/-) bangs under his belt before he starts looking for a long term deal. Women are better at covering that kind of shit up then men are at discovering  her past.

 

Developing an attitude which allows women to feel free to “fully express themselves”  will save a man a lot of hassle. Mostly what it will do is allow you to see what their temper tantrums are like. How they handle anger is important to me, as is how they view their past mistakes. Being outwardly nonjudgmental allows them to confess their bullshit. If a chick owns her shit, then maybe her past doesn’t matter as much, but chicks who own their shit are unicorns